11 Online Dating Mistakes Smooth Guys Know To Avoid
Gone are the days of having to rely on meeting your significant other at work or the gym. Now we’re all swiping and clicking our way to true love. However, successfully using dating sites is both an art and a science, and it’s left many guys unsure of how to proceed. In fact, a lot of well-meaning dudes are unknowingly driving potential matches insane as they try to get to know them better on dating apps and sites. If you want to increase your success rate on places like Tinder, Hinge, or OkCupid, avoid some of these common faux pas:
Writing A Message That Simply Says “Hi”
It doesn’t leave much room for conversation, plus it’s too generic. We know you’re copying and pasting this “blah” introduction over and over.
Asking Why Your Match Is On The App/Site
Online dating should be like Fight Club. We just don’t talk about the fact that we’re doing it. Obviously we’ve joined because we’re single, not because we thought it was the Domino’s app. Move on to other topics, such as shared interests, what we like to do around the city, etc. There’s also no need to discuss the amount of “luck” we’re having on the app or how long we’ve been using said app.
A Bare-Bones Profile
Yes, some guys just list their height and nothing else. Cool that you’re 6’4”, but when that’s all you’ve told us about you it makes it hard to start a conversation. Also, contrary to popular belief, height isn’t everything. Worse yet is the guys who list no information at all. Favorite movies? Hobbies? Weird talents? Anything? Bueller?
Dropping Lines Like “Hey Gorgeous” Or “Hey Beautiful”
This just feels ick, even if you mean well.
Using Old Photos Or Relying On Group Shots
Where’s Waldo is an adorable series of children’s books. It shouldn’t be part of your dating strategy. Ditch that picture of you playing lacrosse in high school or the shot of you and your 20 closest friends in favor of a recent solo snap. Meeting strangers is unnerving enough. We want to be able to pick you out in a crowd.
Using Pictures That Feature A Random Child
The strategy behind the idea makes sense. We see you with a kid and it sends a message to our brains that you’d be a great father, cue ovary explosion. However, in reality it just confuses us and gets us thinking about whether we’re ready to be a stepmom. Skip the niece/nephew shots unless you make it explicitly clear that the kiddo isn’t yours. Unless, of course, he/she is — and then you should specify that.
Listing All The Traits You DON’T Want In A Partner
You don’t want drama. You don’t want someone who’s clingy. It’s okay to make your list of “must haves” known, but coming at it from a negative standpoint makes you seem aggressive. Instead, flip it around and frame it as a list of things you do want in a relationship. You want someone who’s easygoing and independent. That’s much more pleasant to read.
Answering Without Furthering The Conversation
If we write to you and your reply doesn’t include a question, it’s a hint that you’re not interested. If you want to keep chatting, make it a point to ask a follow-up question, or add in something that encourages further conversation.
Getting Impatient When A Woman Doesn’t Reply Immediately
Much to our parents’ dismay, finding a significant other isn’t always our first priority. Guys who send an initial message, then immediately reply with “??” and then “why didn’t you respond?” freak us out.
Throwing Up Red Flags Left And Right
If your profile is all about how you just got out of a long relationship/your family forced you to join/you haven’t had any luck on this site but you’re trying again, don’t be surprised when you don’t get many interested matches. People want positive and open-minded, not someone who’s on the rebound or is bitter about their situation.
Online dating instantly puts you in touch with hundreds of people you’d probably never meet otherwise. While this can be a lot to process, approaching the situation with positivity, a sense of humor, and a few updated pictures makes it easy to swipe your way to your next great relationship.
BONUS: Using Free Or Sketchy Online Dating Sites
If you’re not in a position to pay a monthly fee to use a dating site or app, that’s totally fine. But for those of you who have money to blow on frivolous purchases but who are still using free sites, it’s worth asking why you don’t do yourself a favor and invest a little in your dating experience. Using a reputable paid site, like one of the well-reviewed ones below, can save you a lot of hassle in the long run — you won’t have to weed out fake profiles or people who aren’t looking for what you are. Think about it:
AskMen Recommends: Zoosk is AskMen’s top-rated online dating option, and for a reason. Boasting an easy-to-use site with state-of-the-art features and a booming community of singles, it’s a strong contender if you’re looking for just one dating site to sign up for in your quest for love.
AskMen Recommends: Match is about as classic as it comes in the online dating world, as the brand has been around since the late ’90s. Far from some dusty relic, however, the site has kept pace with the times and stands as one of the best of the bunch, offering users a brand name they can trust.
AskMen Recommends: Not everyone is searching for the love of their life; some just want someone to meet up with tonight. If that’s you, consider giving FriendFinder-X a whirl. It’s a highly ranked hookup site option that’ll make finding a naughty, no-strings-attached affair feel a little less sleazy.
Source : AskMen.com